148God Damn Religion

Satanic

…Allah’s Delusions of Grandeur

 

3

With Whom Am I Speaking?

 

I am afraid that something bad has happened to me.
Bukhari:V1B1N3-V6B60N478

Something bad has happened to me.

 

The Quran starts off no better than Muhammad himself. The prophet’s first revelation was a fiasco. But so as not to prejudice the historic beginnings of Islam, I shall let the first Muslims do it for us.

Let’s begin with what the un-god of Islam has to say in his inaugural Quran address. This demonic encounter isn’t in the first surah. It isn’t even inscribed in the first fifty chapters. It’s buried near the end of the book.

The surah, oddly named, Al-Alaq | The Clot, is the 96^th of 114 literary flops…

Quran 096.001 “Read in the name of your Lord who created,

Quran 096.002 has created man from a clot (coagulated blood).

Quran 096.003 Read! And your Lord is most bountiful.

Quran 096.004 Who taught by the pen

Quran 096.005 Taught man what he did not know.”

That’s the whole shebang. The moment of moments: the birth of Islam. An unnamed spirit, representing an unidentified Lord, reveals itself to someone, and that’s it.

Why would an all-knowing deity ask an illiterate man to read? Why does the spirit tell us that man was created from blood clots when it’s not true? If this spirit “taught by 149the pen what men did not know,” where are those words? Why digress to oral recitals when written testimony is superior?

It’s not a very auspicious beginning for a religion capable of ensnaring two billion souls. There must be a cogent explanation. Yet the Quran, which garners its name from the Hebrew qara’, the first word of the first revelation, makes no attempt to explain the nature of the meeting or the meaning of the message.

There are but a handful of not-so-credible accounts of what happened that night. So let’s turn to al-Bukhari first. In his Book of Revelation, we find a Hadith narrated by Aisha, Muhammad’s child “wife.” She was the six-year-old daughter of Abu Bakr, the man who became the first Caliph. She had yet to be conceived when this event allegedly occurred in a cave overlooking the ruins of Petra.

Bukhari:V1B1N3-V6B60N478 “The commencement of divine inspiration to Allah’s Messenger was in the form of dreams that came true like a bright light. The Prophet loved the seclusion of a cave in Hira.

The angel came to him and asked him to read. The Prophet replied, ‘I do not know how to read.’ The Prophet added, ‘Then the angel caught me forcefully and pressed me so hard that I could not bear it any more [sic].

He released me and asked me to read. I replied, “I do not know how to read.” Thereupon he caught me again and pressed me till I could not bear it any more [sic]. He asked me to read but I replied, “I do not know how to read or what shall I read?”

Thereupon, he caught me for the third time and pressed me, “Read in the name of your Lord who has created man from a clot. Read! Your Lord is the most generous.” Then the Apostle returned from that experience; the muscles between his neck and shoulders were trembling, and his heart beating severely.

He went to Khadija and cried, ‘Cover me! Cover me!’ She did until his fear subsided. He said, ‘What’s wrong with me? I am afraid that something bad has happened to me.’ Khadija replied, ‘Never! By Allah, Allah will never disgrace you.’”

150Allah’s name wasn’t mentioned in the first Quran surah. In fact, Muhammad’s god remained an unnamed “Lord” throughout the first seventeen Quran revelations. When the Lord was finally identified, his name was Rahman. Further, the Quranic introduction came by way of an ill-informed and uneducated spirit, most likely a demon.

It’s curious, then, that this crucial Islamic Hadith contradicts the Quran and calls the Lord “Allah.” Equally curious, why did Muhammad’s wife, the pagan Khadija, swear by Allah when the god who bore that name was one of many rock idols?

The answers are simple, different, and revealing. Aisha, the source of this Hadith, didn’t reveal it until after the prophet’s death – long after Rahman’s name had been incorporated into Allah’s character. As for Khadija, Allah held the keys to something she and her husband coveted.

The various accounts of what happened on this night are consistently inconsistent. And while that’s bad as it relates to their re-creationist portrayals of creation and patriarchs, those were events from another time, another people, another place, and another book – which they twisted to suit their new agenda. Now Muslims are without excuse. Islam began in their midst, on their watch, and through their clan. We aren’t dealing with things that occurred two to four thousand years BCE. This is 610 CE.

Contradiction is now condemning, for it forces us to recognize that all Islamic scripture was conceived and preserved in like fashion – originating from an idiot and conveyed through oral transmission. If these recollections aren’t reliable, nothing is.

The second and third versions of the first revelation are found in Tabari and Muslim:

Tabari VI:67 “Aisha reported: ‘Solitude became dear to Muhammad and he used to seclude himself in the cave of Hira where he would engage in the Tahannuth [pagan religious rites 151performed in Ramadhan that included fasting] worship for a number of nights before returning to Khadija and getting provisions for a like period, till truth came upon him while he was in a cave. The first form of revelation was a true vision in sleep. He did not see any vision but it came like the break of dawn.’”

Muslim C74B1N301 “The truth came unexpectedly and said: ‘Recite,’ to which he replied: ‘I am not lettered.’ The Apostle said, ‘He took hold of me, and pressed me, till I was hard pressed. He let me off and said: “Recite.” I said: “I am not lettered.”’”

This uninspired banter carried on as before. Then in the Tarikh, the story of this ongoing nightmare was advanced with this line:

Tabari VI:67 “Muhammad, you are the Messenger.”

If that is what the Pen intended to teach, why not say so? And if this fellow was going to be the Lord’s teacher, why did he pick an illiterate numbskull?

What follows is convoluted, out of order, and conflicting – just like the Quran...

Tabari VI:67 “The Prophet said, ‘I had been standing, but fell to my knees; and crawled away, my shoulders trembling. I went to Khadija and said, “Wrap me up!” When the terror had left me, he came to me and said, “Muhammad, you are the Messenger of Allah.”’

Muhammad said, ‘I had been thinking of hurling myself down from a mountain crag, but he appeared to me as I was thinking about this and said, “I am Gabriel and you are the Messenger.” Then he said, “Recite!” I said, “What shall I recite?” He took me and pressed me three times. I told Khadija, “I fear for my life.” She said, “Rejoice, for Allah will never put you to shame.”’”

While there are significant differences between these versions, and insights worth examining, I want to focus on the most incriminating details. In the first version, that of the Quran, an unnamed demon, in an unidentified location, at an undisclosed time, without context or introduction, tells an illiterate man to read, then he lied, claiming that 152humans were created from a clot while making a grammatical mistake in his first sentence.

He demands a second time that this person read, without waiting for a response to the first command or offering the undisclosed individual anything to read. The spirit, whom we will discover, lurked in a dark cave, and assumed that the unidentified man had a bountiful Lord, even though he had offered nothing. The spirit concludes by professing that an inanimate object, in this case an unidentified pen, intended to teach what men did not know. There was no salutation or conclusion. Therefore, by any rational standard, this was a horrendous beginning.

In the second version, found in Bukhari’s Hadith collections, we are told that this embarrassing pronouncement was “the commencement of divine inspiration to Allah’s Messenger.” That being the case, Allah’s career as a god crashed before it got off the ground. In the Bukhari Hadith, the encounter occurred as a dream, which would have been while the would-be messenger was sleeping. We are told that the bundle of Quranic errors and anomalies, such as asking an illiterate man to read and then demanding it a second time without providing anything to read – ever – “came true like a bright light.” And that’s particularly odd since Allah wasn’t there, clots are not a means of conception, and inanimate objects don’t make good teachers.

After telling us that Allah’s Messenger was dreaming, we are told that he “loved the seclusion of a cave.” That would make him a damn poor choice as a messenger.

In the Hadith, the sleeping man’s cave visitor was an angel. But since this was Allah’s divine inspiration to his messenger, it follows that Allah was that angel and not God. However, he was ill-informed, since we now have affirmation that Muhammad was illiterate. And since he was mean-spirited, the angel was demonic.

153The Sunnah Tradition also states that the experience was unpleasant because the spiritual being was “forcefully pressing on me so hard that I could not bear it anymore.” Allah was, therefore, abusive. He was also repetitive, making the same demand a second and third time. Although in the Hadith, unlike the Quran, Muhammad was able to talk as he was having the life pressed out of him. And on the third iteration of this foolishness, Muhammad even admits that he was given nothing to read – which would continue to be the case throughout his life.

In the Hadith, there are three iterations of “read” while in the Quran there are only two. And in the Hadith, the Quran’s grammar is corrected.

Then we learn more from the Hadith than we do in the Quran. Muhammad returned home from his bad dream in the cave, but was an emotional mess, trembling rather than excited. He was so terrified by the experience, a grown man pleaded with his aging wife to cover him up. Muhammad even admitted that there was something terribly wrong with him – which is now blatantly apparent. However, his rich wife is having nothing of it. She doesn’t want her husband disgraced and humiliated by this meeting with the Devil and therefore claims that Allah will make something out of this that will be good for them. And then in this case, the revelation comes after the terrifying encounter and encouragement from Khadija.

Then moving to Tabari and Muslim we find yet another incriminating acknowledgment. Muhammad was in the cave engaging in the pagan religious rites of Tahannuth worship – making this part of an ongoing Ramadan fast before Islam was invented. And in version three, this wasn’t just a dream, Muhammad was fast asleep. Moreover, we are told that the non-prophet didn’t see anything other than “the break of dawn.” And even that’s telling because Satan is the Lord of the Dawn.

154In an informed and rational world, there would be no Qurans to burn because there would never have been any reason to print one. It is hard to overstate just how awful this really is. If a would-be author took this to a publisher they would laugh him or her out of the office.

The Tarikh’s variation would go on to say that the victim of spiritual abuse had been Muhammad and that he was now “the Messenger.” Of who and what?

Contradicting everything we have heard, this time Muhammad was standing rather than sleeping. He fell to his knees and then crawled away, frightened – indeed, terrified. What kind of spirit would do that to a man?

Then comes the most damaging admission of all – after being abused by his wannabe god, Muhammad tried unsuccessfully to commit suicide. At this point, Muhammad becomes delusional, and after the bout with Allah in the cave, in which he saw nothing, he sees Gabriel, who reassures him. So, this once again leads to the inescapable conclusion that the demonic angel in the cave was Allah. It’s all becoming a hellish nightmare for Islam.

This is peculiar because the Quran says nothing of Gabriel during the first twelve years of Muhammad’s mission. We are not introduced until the first surah in Yathrib, which was the 91^st chronologically. Since Muhammad alleges that Gabriel was the source of his revelation, these inconsistencies devastate his credibility.

That known, please buckle your seatbelts because I’d like to share the most “esteemed” version of Islam’s initial revelation. It’s a bit more colorful and comes courtesy of Ishaq’s biography, compiled a hundred years before the other sources.

Ishaq:105 “Aisha said that when Allah desired to honor Muhammad, the first sign of prophethood was a vision in brightness of day shown to him in his sleep. [In other words, he was dreaming.]

155He liked nothing better than to be alone. When he left Mecca and there was no house in sight, every stone and tree that passed by said, ‘Peace be unto you, Allah’s Apostle.’ Muhammad would turn around and see naught but trees and stones. [In other words, he was stoned.]

He stayed seeing and hearing things as long as it pleased Allah. Then Gabriel came to him with the gift of Allah’s grace [the spiritual beating] while he was on Hira in the month of Ramadhan.

The Apostle would pray in seclusion on Hira every year for a month to practice Tahannuth as was the custom of the Quraysh in the heathen days. [In other words, Muhammad was a heathen and the Islamic Pillar requiring Ramadhan fasting was pagan.]

Tahannuth is religious devotion [to pagan idols]. After praying in seclusion, he would walk around the Ka’aba seven times. [The centerpiece of the Hajj Pillar is pagan as well.]”

The promotions were coming rapidly. In the Quran, he was unidentified. In the first Hadith, he became a messenger. In the second, he is named. Now he’s a prophet. With another variation, he might be elevated to god. Lord knows, he couldn’t do any worse.

In this rendition, Muhammad was sleeping in the middle of the day, which would make him a bum. He remains a loner, which, if things had continued that way would have been better for everyone. He hears stones and trees talk to him, which would make him psychotic and schizophrenic. However, there is another diagnosis because those who hallucinate about being harmed while claiming to hear things never said, more commonly suffer from the incurable and horrifically irritating malady known as Borderline Personality Disorder. These delusional and aggravating malcontents perceive that they are being victimized and that they are underappreciated – akin to what we have read throughout the Never-Ending Argument. This empathy disorder explains why the Quran’s dialog isn’t credible, why lies are presented as if they were true, and why the text is so contentious.

156Moving on to the next portrayal of the Quran’s inception, we find our second affirmation that the Ramadan fast and circumambulating the Ka’aba were pagan, with both derived from Tahannuth religious devotion to Self-Justification. They were cultic traditions of the Quraysh, the vast majority of whom were opposed to Muhammad, Allah, Islam, and the Quran. This is devastating to the myth that Islam was the monotheistic religion of Muhammad.

However, there is another ticking timebomb lurking within these variant presentations of this demonic encounter. While the Quran will not mention Gabriel’s mythical role as the spiritual contact between un-god and non-prophet for more than a decade, since these Hadith were composed two to three centuries after the fact, Muhammad’s invisible accomplice was backdated into the story to resolve a nagging problem – who was in the cave?

Why was the spirit so deranged that it tried to suffocate Muhammad, pressing itself into him forcibly, and with such trauma, he thought he had been demon-possessed and tried to commit suicide? If this was Allah, why was he acting like Satan? If an angel, why so demonic?

And that was just the beginning of the Quranic headache. There were many Christians in Petra at this time, and they were mocking Muhammad because he arrived without an angelic announcement – something we know because this vocal criticism was repeated throughout the Never-Ending Argument. They asked, “Why was no angel sent to him” because Christians had been led to believe through the fables contrived in the Gospel of Luke that an angel named Gabriel came to a woman named Mary to announce the arrival of a god named Jesus. While none of that was true, since Muhammad was claiming to be better than Jesus, he was rejected because Gabriel hadn’t foretold his arrival.

157As a result, the creators of Islam in Baghdad worked Gabriel into the Hadith they were writing to solve this persistent criticism, embellishing their mythology. After all, who would dare argue against the imaginary fiend of someone without friends – especially when doing so would typically result in decapitation, as it does even to this day?

However, while Gabriel can be used to explain why Allah is never seen or heard, while he can be blamed for abusing Muhammad in the cave, and while he can be used to make the non-prophet appear invincible when threatened, even on par with that Jesus fellow, this imaginary fiend wields a two-edged sword. It renders the most repeated theme in the Quran – its Never-Ending Argument – false. How could no angel have been sent to him if an angel had been dispatched to him at the very initiation of these revelations? And how can Allah work alone, without partners, helpers, or co-workers associated with him if any recital, much less every revelation, was through Gabriel? And under those circumstances, how can the Quran have been revealed by a first-person narrator if someone other than its schizophrenic wannabe god was speaking? Further, when asked incessantly, “Why was no angel sent to him?” why didn’t Gabriel / Allah, say that he had been there from the beginning?

Even worse, if we were to play along and assume that Muhammad encountered a demanding, ill-informed, inaccurate, and mean-spirited entity in the cave while being religious, who was so vicious, his messenger attempted suicide because he thought he had been demon-possessed, then isn’t the only rational conclusion that he was possessed by one of Satan’s emissaries? It would explain the Quran’s hatred of Yahuwdym, claims to the Towrah, fixation on death, and insistence that a devilish imposter was greater than God Almighty.

Ishaq:106 “The Prophet set off to Hira with his family. When it was night, Gabriel brought him the command of Allah.

158‘He came to me,’ the Apostle said, ‘while I was asleep, with a coverlet of brocade whereon was some writing, and said, ‘Read.’ I said, ‘What shall I read?’ He pressed me so tightly that I was near death. Then he let go and said, ‘Read!’”

This happens twice more, then…“When I thought I was nearly dead I said, ‘What shall I read; only to deliver myself from him, lest he should do the same thing to me again.

He said, ‘Read in the name of your Lord who created man of blood coagulated. Read! Your generous Lord taught by the pen.’”

Then the illiterate man said, “So I read it, and he departed from me. I awoke from my sleep. These words were written on my heart.”

Ishaq reports that like Moses, Muhammad was a reluctant troubadour and he did not previously respect those who, like him, were demon-possessed:

Ishaq:106 “None of Allah’s creatures was more hateful to me than an ecstatic poet or a man possessed. I thought, ‘Woe is me, I’m a possessed poet.’”

The worst thing that can befall a person is to be possessed by the Devil. They lose all sense of decency. To his credit, Muhammad recognized what had happened. To his shame, he damned billions of souls along with his own.

Demon possession is rare. Previous to Muhammad, the most infamous victim had been Paul, the author of and inspiration behind the Christian New Testament. He had a similarly horrific encounter, which was blinding and laming, with Satan on the road to Damascus. And he admitted being demon-possessed at the conclusion of 2^nd Corinthians. Prior to this, we are told that another Sha’uwl, this one Israel’s preferred leader circa 1000 BCE, was demon-possessed.

Muhammad admitted it and his peers recognized it, repeating the accusation throughout the Never-Ending Argument. And frankly, it is the only viable explanation of 159what we witness in Muhammad’s life and read in the Quran. Therefore…

Ishaq:106 “I will go to the top of the mountain and throw myself down that I may kill myself and be at rest.”

No doubt, Islam’s non-prophet was now hearing voices. The rocks were speaking to him. He didn’t actually make all of this up. It was true, and this is his confession. And it still rings true because there is no better explanation for how Muslims behaved on October 7^th, 2023, or why Muslims have celebrated the atrocities of marauding mass murderers and rapists, of terrorists that get off on torturing and kidnapping children.

Everything we will read from this point forward, whether it be from the Quran or Hadith, is a product of this episode in the cave which left Muhammad knowing that he had been demon-possessed. He was now Satan’s pawn, the Devil’s Advocate, a revolting reflection of his Lord.

Terrorized by the demon within him, Muhammad wanted to commit suicide – something that Satan could not allow. He had big plans for his prophet.

Ishaq:106 “So I climbed to the mountain to kill myself when I heard a voice saying, ‘Muhammad, you are Allah’s Apostle.’ I raised my head to see who was speaking and lo, I saw Gabriel in the form of a man with feet astride the horizon.”

How would the terrified and possessed poet distinguish between Gabriel and Satan? And since the first revelation was sinister, that’s a problem. Moreover, if Muhammad could see him, why couldn’t anyone else – especially since he was ginormous? And why, if the spirit in the cave had been Gabriel, couldn’t Muhammad see him then, how did he fit in the cave since he is so big, why was there no introduction, and why pick this name? Clearly, the answers are both obvious and horrifying.

160Bukhari:V9B87N113 “The Prophet said, ‘A good dream is from Allah, and a bad dream is from Satan.’” By his own account, this had been a nightmare.

Ishaq:106 “I stood gazing at him and that distracted me from committing suicide. I couldn’t move. Khadija sent her messengers in search of me and they gained the high ground above Mecca so I came to her and sat by her thigh. She said, ‘O Abu’l-Qasim, where have you been?’ I said, ‘Woe is me. I am possessed.’

She said, ‘I take refuge in Allah from that Abu’l-Qasim. Allah would not treat you that way. This cannot be, my dear. Perhaps you did see something,’” Khadija said, wheels of commerce turning in her head.

“‘Yes, I did,’ I said,” playing along. “I told her of what I had seen [while I was asleep]. She said, ‘Rejoice, son of my uncle, and be of good cheer. Verily, by Him in whose hand is Khadija’s soul, I have hope that you will be the prophet to this people.’”

With that, the Profitable Prophet Plan was born. “She gathered her garments and went to her cousin Waraqa bin Naufal [a Hanif], who had become a Christian. He read the scriptures and learned from those who followed the Torah and the Gospels.”

Before we read the embellishments Tabari provides, please pause now and reflect upon the realization that these Hadith have not only described a hellish encounter with a spirit but also that Muhammad has now admitted on three occasions that he was demon-possessed at the initiation of his Quranic revelations! Every Hadith collection not only says the same thing, the sources are as impeccable as is possible in Islam – Muhammad’s first and second wife.

If Muhammad was demon-possessed, as every Sunnah source claims when trying to make sense of the first inspired revelation, then the Quran is Satan’s recital and Muslims worship the Devil. If Muhammad was not demon-possessed, he was a liar, and his companions cannot be trusted. And since they serve as the lone conduit to the Quran, it cannot be trusted.

161The birth of Islam was a miscarriage. The religion was born dead. It is either Satanic or untrustworthy.

I could conclude God Damn Religion at the point of the Quran’s conception and prevail in my debate against Allah and Muhammad, the Quran and Hadith. They have self-destructed and have admitted defeat.

So now, having prevailed in the intellectual contest against Allah, if not for how today’s slaves to Satan, infected with his demonic tripe, are calling for the annihilation of Jews, I would move on to more pleasant things. Or, alternatively, since my Father is insistent on this endeavor, under Yahowah’s watch, I can make this unique approach to protecting His people, this scathing attack on Muhammad and Allah, as entertaining as possible. To do so, I will continue to walk in the footsteps of ‘ElYah | Elijah, the prophet who entertained the Almighty with his pejorative and sarcastic annihilation of the “Muslims” and “Christians” of his day – the proponents of Ba’al | the Lord and ‘Asherah | the Blessed Mother of God.

Tabari VI:70 “He went to Khadija and said, ‘I think that I have gone mad.’ ‘No, by Allah,’ she said. ‘Your Lord would never do that to you. You have never committed a wicked act.’ Khadija went to Waraqa and told him what had happened. He said, ‘If what you have said is true, your husband is a prophet.’ After this Gabriel did not come to him for a while and Khadija said, ‘I think that your Lord must hate you.’”

It is the fickle finger of fate. As is the case with all lies, unless they are repeated, they are forgotten. Without another demonic encounter, Muhammad would be seen as delusional. That realization was now obvious to everyone, including Muhammad and Khadija. And since no one wants a madman in their bed, even if he had been a perfect playmate during the first 40 to 58 years of his life, by having made her pronouncement, the genie could not be shoved back into the cave.

162So, Muhammad was committed – or he would have been committed to the looney bin of Petra and mocked as a madman. So to counter his critics and show them who was conning whom, the practitioner of Tahannuth not only recited the worst book not written, he became the most immoral man who ever lived.

To protest otherwise, Khadija solicited the endorsement of Waraqa – the leading Christian in Petra. But it wasn’t much of a commendation since it began, “if what you have said is true…” But alas, it was not.

This is followed by yet one more variant…

Tabari VI:70 “In the beginning of the Messenger’s prophetic mission he used to spend a month every year in religious retreat on Hira. This was part of the practice of Tahannuth in which the Quraysh used to engage during the Jahiliyyah. Tahannuth means self-justification.’”

That’s intriguing. Muhammad practiced a Jahiliyyah ritual rite, an ignorant pre-Islamic form of pagan worship. What’s more, the very definition of Tahannuth – self-justification – became synonymous with this prophet’s personal agenda. (As a curiosity, Tahannuth is from the Hebrew tachanunah, which means “to beg for favors.”)

So much for Muhammad’s claim of having been prevented from doing any pagan act by Allah. Islam began in the midst of a pagan ritual. That’s embarrassing, especially for a religion in which all polytheists are burnt alive in the hell fires.

The more we probe the dark recesses of Islam’s initial bout with the Devil, the worse it gets. So hold your nose if you must, because it’s time to poke around.

We know that Muhammad was a recluse – a hermit who preferred solitude to people. The fact he spent so much time alone in caves instead of at home being a parent and husband or at work being productive is troubling. Yes, he 163was being religious, but even that is problematic. As an idolater, he practiced the heathen Tahannuth rituals – fasting, self-justification, and meditation – during the pagan holy month of Ramadhan. He disappeared into caves for spiritual awakening, calling out to a Black Stone named Allah. And he was ultimately possessed.

The “read” versus “recite” debate is interesting in itself. Modern Muslims, in trying to solve the obvious problem of why an all-knowing spirit would ask an illiterate man to read, say that the word, which is derived from the Hebrew verb, qara’, really means “recite.” But that’s worse.

Why would Muhammad say he didn’t know how to recite, especially when that became his only schtick – well, at least apart from being a serial rapist, consummate pedophile, and world-class terrorist? And why would the spirit of Islam ask a man to recite if he taught by the pen? Moreover, Muhammad was never given anything to read.

Since we have discussed Allah’s ignominious inaugural address, let’s move on to the non-prophet’s less-than-heroic response. According to every account, he was scared spitless. Imagine that, you’ve just invested the month of Ramadhan begging the spirits for favors, hoping that one would arrive, and then when one shows up, it scares the bejesus out of you. In the earliest versions, he is said to have been so distraught he wanted to commit suicide. The whole encounter is not only demonic, but the wannabe prophet also admitted he had been possessed.

After the “revelation” was over, the newly minted messenger slid down the picturesque slopes of rose sandstone, scurried across some dunes and religious relics, and entered the narrow valley town, where he immediately cuddled up to mama (and make no mistake, his wife was the closest thing to a mother he’d ever known). Panicked and tormented, the 40-to-58-year-old recluse cried out to 164his sixty-year-old wife, “Cover me,” crawling into a fetal position against her thigh.

He thought he’d been molested by a jinn, possessed by a demonic spirit, in the dark of night. He said, “I do not know what has happened to me. I fear for myself.” “He poured out his mental confusion,” and according to Ibn Ishaq, said, “I’m afraid I’m going out of my mind and being possessed by an evil spirit.”

Since Muhammad admitted it, why do Muslims lash out and kill those who agree with him, acknowledging the Satanic influence on the Quran? Do they disagree with their prophet?

What Khadija did next set the forces in motion that ultimately condemned three billion souls, enslaved over a billion women, and plunged the world into chaos. She founded Islam. Muhammad was her first convert. In a twist of sadistic irony, the most liberated and prosperous woman in Islamic literature built the cage in which all Muslim women remain trapped.

Calming her husband and employee down she said, “Rejoice, cousin, and be of good cheer. You will be the Prophet. Allah will not bring you to shame…” Muhammad thinks he’s just gone mano-a-mano in a wrestling match with a demon and Khadija says it isn’t so. “It can’t be. Be happy. I swear by Allah that He shall never humiliate you.” “I hope that you may be the prophet of this community.”

Yes, Muhammad married his cousin. It is common among Muslims. Interbreeding is largely responsible for their demonstrable lack of intelligence and civility. That may sound pejorative, but it is a statement of fact. Wherever Islam corrupts the culture, there is a high prevalence of consanguineous marriages. And since it is easy to test in Gaza where international health workers build and staff the hospitals, we know that 74.7% of non-sibling patients are associated with consanguineous 165parents, of them 54.4% first-cousins and 20.3% second-cousins. This is why the British tested their average IQ at 67.9 and they have a grossly abnormal occurrence of birth defects (under 2% in the West vs over 30% in Islamic nations with mental disorders leading this parade).

At this time, Allah was just one of 360 stones gathering dust in the Ka’aba. Together with Hubal, Manaf, Al-Uzza, Al-Lat, and the gang, they were the lichen and fungi on Ka’aba’s rockpile. No Ka’aba, no hajj. No hajj, no festival. No festival, no money. Khadija was a businesswoman – in business to make money selling her wares to the pilgrims who piled into Petra each year to visit their gods.

She wasn’t going to let anything foul that up. Not only did she tell her employee/husband that he was wrong, that it was not a demon, she said that her god, the pagan lunar deity, the biggest and blackest stone in the Ka’aba, would never allow him to be molested by an angry spirit – no way!

Then, in anticipation of what was to come, she began her public relations campaign. She told her recluse husband that he was a swell guy, charitable, sociable, and trustworthy. He was the perfect candidate to be the Social Chairman of the new cultish Fraternity.

Bright and successful, Khadija was on a mission. She came up with a profitable prophet plan. She had prospered in a man’s world but had no real power. In fact, she was embarrassed. Having been widowed twice, she had proposed marriage to Muhammad, a much younger employee. It was scandalous.

To gain permission, she had to get the patriarch of her family drunk at the betrothal feast. Once he was successfully intoxicated, Khadija was able to coerce the consent she required. The odd couple were married, but all was not a bed of cactus flowers. Their sons died in infancy. It was a terrible stain in a culture that, like Islam, attributed 166misfortune to godly disdain. Khadija’s husband was an absentee parent to their remaining daughters, and AWOL when it came to working in the family business. He was an illiterate recluse with a penchant for lone vigils in barren, lightless caves, which in a small town of perhaps a few thousand, was gossip fodder. He was hardly making her look good. You just know that the girls were talking behind her back.

So to turn the tables on them, Khadija tells her husband that he’s the prophet of his people – Allah’s guy. As “God’s Messenger” he’s important, and so is she. The lucrative custodianship of the Ka’aba, the even more lucrative administration of the hajj, the religious tax, was Muhammad’s birthright, she implied, but fate had dealt him a savage blow.

Now, Khadija knew that opportunity was knocking. She and he could have it all, everything they coveted – prestige, money, power. All they had to do was convince the neighbors that Muhammad was Allah’s Messenger. Since Allah was just a rock, no one would ever be able to dispute their claim. What was Allah going to do – roll over, crumble, actually speak? “No way. It can’t be. Be happy. I swear by Allah that He shall never humiliate you.”

Khadija even tells her hubby that he’s perfect for the job: truthful, generous with her money, and for a loner, he’s caring and entertaining. But it must not have been enough. Prophet Man just laid there quivering.



What little we have heard thus far makes no sense when attributed to a divine revelation. However, it makes perfect sense when we view the Quran in the context of a self-aggrandizement scheme – the self-justification of the 167Tahannuth. Therefore, Khadija was trying to proselytize Muhammad and recruit him into her Profitable Prophet Plan. So what do you suppose she’d do next? Get someone “religious” to validate her claim, perhaps? Yes indeed, so let’s return to the Hadith to see when and how…

Bukhari:V1B1N3 “Khadija then took Muhammad to Waraqa bin Naufal. He was the son of Khadija’s uncle [and the brother of a sorceress]. He was the only man in town who had embraced Christianity in the pre-Islamic Days of Ignorance. He used to write the writing with Hebrew letters. He would write from the Gospel in Hebrew as much as Allah wished him to write. He was very old and had lost his eyesight.”

Petra was rife with Christians and Jews. Once the Nabateans and Romans moved out, those looking for a place to hide found it among the crumbling ruins of what had once been the most acclaimed religious town east of Karnak.

Jews wrote in Hebrew, the language of the Towrah, and Christians in Greek, the language of their New Testament, so someone is confused. Further, almost everyone was and remains less ignorant than Muslims. As a result of these blunders, this endorsement wasn’t worth its weight in the Hebrew letters it wasn’t written upon.

Bukhari:V1B1N3 “Khadija told Waraqa, ‘Listen to the story of your nephew, my cousin!’ Waraqa asked, ‘Nephew, what have you seen?’ Muhammad described whatever he had seen.

Waraqa said, ‘This is the same one who keeps the secrets whom Allah had sent to Moses. I wish I were young and could live up to the time when your people would expel you!’

Muhammad asked, ‘Will they drive me out?’ Waraqa replied, ‘Yes, anyone who came with something similar to what you have brought was treated with hostility.’ A few days later, Waraqa died and the divine inspiration was paused for a long while.” (Sunnah.com/Bukhari/1/3)

168No. There are no depictions of giant angels in the Towrah standing between mountains, no near-death experiences in caves battling demonic spirits, no insisting that illiterate men read, no declarations that conception is derived from a clot of blood, and there is no Professor Pen. There was no secret keeper, and no one was sent to Moses, as he was the one sent to Pharaoh. And since we took the time to review the nature of the one who was foretold by Moseh, we know that he spoke of Dowd | David, the Messiah and Son of God, our Savior, and not a demon-possessed psychopath in Arabia.

Moseh’s people did not expel him. Instead, he liberated them from Egypt. But the inverting of the Towrah was not an accident. Twelve years later, after the Satanic Verses and the Night’s Journey, Muhammad’s kin would drive him out of Petra in disgrace. And since that was embarrassing, those who were writing these Hadith centuries after the fact, attempted to make the shameful Hijra | Migration look like a triumphant Yatsa’ | Exodus. But of course, Muslims would have to remain ignorant and irrational to believe any of this.

Unable to keep their stories straight, even with 300 years available to synchronize them, Ibn Ishaq tells us that Khadija went alone to Waraqa.

Ishaq:107 “When she related to him what Muhammad told her he had seen and heard, Waraqa cried, ‘Holy! Holy! If you have spoken the truth, Khadija [And what are the chances of that?], there has come unto him the Namus, the spirit who appeared long ago to Moses.

Tell Muhammad to be of good cheer, for he is to be the Prophet of his people.’ So Khadija returned to her husband and told him what Waraqa had said. As a result, his fears were somewhat calmed.”

Tabari’s account is presented in Muhammad’s voice: Tabari VI:68 “Then she took me to Waraqa and said, ‘Listen to your brother’s son.’ He questioned me and I told him what had 169happened. He said, ‘This is the Namus which was sent down to Moses, son of Abraham.’”

These boys have all been hit with the stupid stick one too many times. Namus is a corrupted transliteration of the Greek word conjugated nomos, nomo, and nomou. It addresses “something that is established,” and can speak of “an ordinance or a law,” but it is best translated as “assigning and distributing an inheritance to nourish heirs.” Nomos was used by Paul, the previous person to have been possessed by Satan in this way, throughout his letters to denounce the Towrah. So since the spirit of Namus was promoted by Paul to annul the Towrah, it is the antithesis of what was afforded Moseh.

The dialog repeats that found in Bukhari until this line: Tabari VI:68 “The first parts of the Quran to be revealed to me after Iqra were: ‘By the pen and that which they write. You are not a madman. Yours will be a reward unfailing, and you are of a great nature. You shall see and they shall see.”

Muhammad’s quotation is an incomplete variant of the 68^th surah. But the Islamic scholars who, like myself, have attempted to reorder the Quran chronologically, have concluded that the 68^th surah was the fortieth surah allegedly received, not the second.

Montgomery Watt, the translator of this volume of Tabari’s Tarikh, agrees, saying, “The 68^th surah was unlikely to be early, since it implies that Muhammad had been charged with being a madman possessed by jinn.” This error by Muhammad at the very outset of his Quranic career is horrendous. It means that even he couldn’t remember when his “revelations” were given to him.

In a moment, I’ll share both the remainder of the 96^th surah and the salient portions of the 68^th. And with that evidence, you can decide who is lying.

Blind or not, Waraqa, a mere seventy-two hours from death, had become senile and was confused. Nevertheless, 170he served Khadija’s purpose. She used him to convince her clients and kin that Allah had a messenger. Her man was the next Moses, a prophet to her people.

So how does a new religion spring to life on such shaky ground? If the facts are so obviously fallacious, how could the revelation be truthful?

What I’m going to say next will appear scandalous at first blush. I believe Muhammad murdered Waraqa. The Hanif was the most revered holy man in Petra/Mecca. After Khadija had used him, he became a liability – someone who could and would profess that Muhammad’s claims were untrue. When you finish God Damn Religion and discover how many men Muhammad assassinated for the same reason, I believe you’ll share my view.

Next, we learn that even Khadija was troubled by Muhammad’s dark adventure into the spirit world.

Tabari VI:73 & Ishaq:107 “‘Cousin, can you tell me when this visitor comes to you?’ Muhammad replied, ‘Yes.’ She said, ‘Tell me then, when he comes.’

Gabriel came to him as before, and Muhammad said, ‘Here is Gabriel who has just come to me.’ She said, ‘Yes? Come, cousin, and sit by my left thigh.’ He came, and she said, ‘Can you see him?’

‘Yes.’ ‘Move around and sit by my right thigh.’ He did so and she said, ‘Can you see him?’ ‘Yes.’ She said, ‘Sit in my lap.’ He did so, and she said, ‘Can you see him?’ He replied, ‘Yes.’

She was grieved, and flung off her veil and disclosed her body while the Apostle was sitting in her lap.”

Parallel Hadith from the same collectors suggest… Tabari VI:73 & Ishaq:107 “Khadija put the Messenger inside her shift next to her body.”

The third variation proclaims: Tabari VI:73 & Ishaq:107 “I heard that she made the Apostle come inside her shift.”

171Both end with: “Then she said, ‘Can you see him?’ ‘No.’ At that she said, ‘Rejoice cousin. By Allah, this spirit is an angel and not Satan.’”

That was creepy. Why not bring in a crystal ball, an Ouija board, and some Tarot cards, then invite the neighbors over for a peep show and game of no show and tell? Albeit I’m not sure I understand why an old lady exposing herself to a lap-dancing wannabe prophet proves anything other than he was evidently excitable. And we are left wondering if angelic Gabriel enjoyed the show.

So, let me explain the method to the Muslim madness on this occasion. The perversion begins with Muhammad’s phobia of having his private parts exposed, which metastasized into forcing women to wear tents. This odd transference occurred because murderous rapists would be less enamored with the appeal of following a wannabe pedophile prophet with an unsightly member. So in light of this backstory from Muhammad’s creation accounts, we are able to resolve the confusion over whether the pretend Jibriel | Gabriel was a Muslim man, an Islamic angel, Allah, Satan, or a demonic spirit. He was subjected to Muhammad’s perverted sexual phobias. Therefore, if the camera-shy spirit was Allah’s Angel, not a devilish demon, he would be too modest to look upon an old woman’s body. His “disappearance” when she flashed him was proof the invisible Gabriel existed and that he was a good Muslim.

But, angels don’t lust, and pre-Islamic women didn’t wear veils. Yet in fairness, Khadija was a sixty-year-old desert dweller, and a peek under her shift might have frightened the Devil. However, she wasn’t the only one who couldn’t see Muhammad’s shy spirit…

Bukhari:V4B54N440 “The Prophet said, ‘Aisha, this is Gabriel. He sends his greetings and salutations to you.’ Aisha replied, ‘Salutations and greetings to him.’ Then addressing the Prophet she said, ‘You see what I don't see.’”

172And he would have been hard to miss… Bukhari:V4B54N455 “The Prophet informed us that he had seen Gabriel and he had 600 wings.” Everything grows bigger in myths, including wannabe prophets, their imaginary spirit pals and, of course, their wannabe gods – Allahu Akbar!

The identity of Muhammad’s dark spirit aside, there was another nagging problem – radio silence. There were no visions, dreams, demonic encounters, or wrestling matches – nothing for nearly three years. The menacing cave critter was nowhere to be found. Every day Muhammad went to visit the spirit at the Ka’aba but the mighty Allah couldn’t even muster a simple “howdy,” or “read,” or whatever rocks are inclined to say when their pen pals stop by for a visit.

It was embarrassing. He was a messenger without a message. Anguished, Muhammad contemplated suicide a second time. So what do you think happened next? Right you are – ProphetVision.

Muslim:C74B1N304 & Bukhari:V4B54N461 “While talking about the period of pause in revelation, the Prophet said, ‘While I was walking, all of a sudden I heard a voice. I looked and saw the angel who had visited me at the cave sitting on a chair in the sky. I got scared of him and ran back home and said, “Wrap me in blankets, Khadija.”

Oops, another slip of the ole-forked tongue. The floating throne belonged to Allah. We have heard it regaled throughout the Hadith and will see it presented similarly in the Quran. And this means the “angel who had visited” Muhammad “at the cave” was, drumroll please…Allah! And as an “angel,” Allah cannot be God, but he can be Satan. Well done, Muslims. We can put a wrap on this one.

Continuing to confess that Allah was a mean-spirited, demon-possessing, cave-dwelling angel and, therefore, not God, we read…

173Muslim:C74B1N304 & Bukhari:V4B54N461 “And then Allah revealed the Verses of the Quran to me. ‘O Muhammad, the shrouded one, wrapped up in garments, arise and warn the people against the Lord’s Punishment, and abandon the idols.’ [This candidate for revelation number two is a divergent recital of Quran 074.001.] After this the revelation started coming strongly, frequently, and regularly.”

The second revelation is found in the 93^rd surah, not the 74^th, the aforementioned 68^th, or even in the remainder of the 96^th. We know this because the 93^rd surah speaks specifically of the multi-year hiatus in divine inspiration.

But how are we supposed to believe anything Islam’s non-prophet says when he can’t keep his own story straight? Further, there are two “enwrapped” surahs, not one, and neither is consistent with Muhammad’s recollection. Besides all of that duplicity, if Allah was sitting on the floating chair, why did Muhammad run home? We’re told that he was suicidal because Allah abandoned him because he hated him. So the authors of Islam want us to believe that Allah returns and his messenger flees?

And all of this is especially curious because we have to leave Petra, where we are lambasted with over ninety surahs before we’re introduced to Allah, the alleged source of these recitals in the Quran. This is lunacy. Then it gets worse. We are asked to believe that Allah, who has been too busy rocking the Ka’aba to deliver a message to his messenger, finally tracks the panicked prophet down. He tells a grown man, hiding under the covers, that he wants him to go out and warn people. Sure, that’s credible.

Why is Allah so angry? Why does he need to punish all the little blood clots? He and his non-prophet are just getting warmed up. We haven’t even been introduced.

If this is supposed to be God speaking, why doesn’t anyone know his name? Remember, all of the early surahs 174use the title Rabbi | Lord. And when the spirit finally gets around to introducing himself, he says that he’s Rahman.

Islam inflicted a fatal blow in embryo…

Muslim:B1N307 & Tabari VI:74 “I asked Abu Salama what was revealed first from the Quran. He said: ‘The shrouded one enveloped in the cloak.’ But I knew better and said: ‘Wasn’t it “Recite?”’ Jabir said: ‘I am telling you what the Messenger told me.

He said: “I stayed in the cave for one month and when my stay was completed, I came down and went into the valley. Somebody called me. I looked but I did not see anybody. I was again called but saw nothing. I raised my head, and there on the Throne in the atmosphere he was sitting. I began to tremble because I was afraid of him.’ These were Uthman’s words, but the correct version is, ‘I was terror-stricken by him. Then I came to Khadija and they threw water on me and Allah sent down this: ‘You who are shrouded, arise and deliver a warning, your Lord magnify, your clothes cleanse.’”

This is the same confession. The ariel throne is none but Allah’s. And since this is supposed to be explaining the inception of the Quran in the 96^th surah, the angel in the cave abusing Muhammad must have been Allah. And as such, Allah cannot be God and must be a demon.

While that is certain, it is also certain that Muhammad was a pathological liar, he had a poor memory, was depressed and suicidal, and he claimed to be demon-possessed. Dear Mother of Islam, I am sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but there was a problem with the delivery of your baby. He went into jihadist mode and committed suicide. We had to bury the little bugger before he infected the other children.

Abul Ala al-Maududi, one of the most famous Quran commentators, explains: “After this first Revelation, no Revelation came down to the Prophet for quite some time. The long suspension was such a period of deep grief and distress for him that he started going early to the tops of the mountains to throw himself down from them. But whenever he stood on the edge of a peak, the 175Angel Gabriel would appear and tell him that he was Allah’s Prophet. This would console him and restore his peace of mind.”

As the author of the esteemed translation and commentary, Tafhim-ul-Quran | Towards Understanding the Quran (published 1972), I have elected to place his comments in bold to clearly distinguish orthodox Islamic thought from my own – especially when this Islamic idealogue has swallowed the poison as if nectar from the fingertips of his Lord. But that is why he's the ideal expositor to convey the Islamic interpretation of the Quran.

Not surprisingly, Abul Ala al-Maududi devoted his life to the prospect of returning Muslims to the 7^th century by imposing Sharia Law. He was an outspoken critic of democracy and secularism, and of political and religious freedom. An opponent of women’s rights, he wrote: “the greatest threat to morality was women’s visibility.”

While quite the naysayer, al-Maududi wasn’t against everything. As the founder of the horrifically brutal Jamaat-e-Islami | Society of Islam, he was an advocate of Islamic terrorism. His intent was to conquer India for Islam rather than split off a Muslim state of Pakistan.

Through his killing club, he would inspire riots against the Ahmadiyya, because their Islam wasn’t as pure as his own, resulting in mass murder. Sentenced to death for his role in the deadly affair, he was soon released because most Pakistanis agreed with him, turning these riots into a victory for the advancement of fundamentalist Islamic terrorism and the superiority of the Muslim state governed by the Quran and Sunnah.

So that we understand Maududi’s stanch and unwavering position on the Quran and Hadith, in his Tafsir | Interpretation, entitled, Tafhimu’l-Qur’an, he stressed four interrelated concepts essential to Quranic study. They include: ilah | divinity, rabb | lordship, ‘ibadah | worship through absolute obedience to the rabb ilah, and din | being 176religious. Therefore, everything in the universe was a Muslim in Maududi’s eyes, since everyone and everything obeyed Allah in submission.

Regarding the Hadith which comprise Sharia Law, Maududi claimed that he could personally sense the words Muhammad spoke and was inspired to correctly interpret them in the manner the prophet intended. Therefore, it would be hard to find a more appropriate resource to opening our minds to Muhammad’s and Allah’s message.

Returning to the Hadith upon which this embarrassing confession is found, it demonstrates that Islam’s lone prophet was suicidal. While al-Maududi would likely disagree with me, and even seek to kill me, from a more sane perspective, it’s too bad Islam’s non-prophet wasn’t successful. Gutless, I suppose.

Tabari VI:76 “The inspiration ceased to come to the Messenger for a while, and he was deeply grieved. He began to go to the tops of mountain crags, in order to fling himself from them; but every time he reached the summit of a mountain, Gabriel appeared to him and said to him, ‘You are Allah’s Prophet.’

Thereupon his anxiety would subside and he would come back to himself.” Muhammad explains: “I was walking one day when I saw the angel who used to come to me at Hira. I was terror-stricken by him.”

If he was comforted by Gabriel every time he wanted to commit suicide, why did his image terrify him? Why didn’t the spirit impart a message if he met with his messenger on these occasions? And why are none of these encounters mentioned in the Quran? The obvious answer is that they did not occur.

Let’s open our Qurans to the next statements found in the 96^th surah, consider the “you are not a madman” reference in the 68^th surah, and then review the 93^rd, 74^th, and 73^rd – all of which are considered to be the second Quranic recital due to Muhammad’s blankies.

177The most natural contender for the second revelation would be the rest of the 96^th sura since it all began with Al-Alaq | The Clot…

Quran 096.001-5 “Read in the name of your Lord who created, has created man from a blood clot. Read! And your Lord is most bountiful, who taught by the pen, taught man what he did not know.

Quran 096.006 Nay! Verily, man is rebellious and inordinate,

Quran 096.007 Because he sees himself independent, sufficient,

Quran 096.008 Lo! Unto your Lord is your return.

Quran 096.009 Have you seen him who forbids and restrains,

Quran 096.010 A slave when he prays?

Quran 096.011 Tell me, if he is on the guidance?

Quran 096.012 Or enjoins piety and guarding?

Quran 096.013 Tell me if he denies and turns away?

Quran 096.014 Knows he not that God sees?

Quran 096.015 Nay, If ceases not, We will catch him by the forelock,

Quran 096.016 A lying, sinful forelock!

Quran 096.017 Then, let him call upon his henchmen.

Quran 096.018 We will call the guards of Hell.

Quran 096.019 Nay! Do not obey him. Fall prostrate and draw nigh.”

Here, we find an unexplained jump to an entirely different topic – that of rebuking another man, one who, while unnamed, is assumed to be Abu Jahl. This is evidence of nothing more than the un-god of Islam and his non-prophet are intolerant of rivals and are awful communicators. It also affirms my contention that Allah is Hell’s Warden.

Since the remainder of the 96^th surah was not the second revelation, this means that the surah designation 178was arbitrary and was not comprised of a single event nor even brought together in chronological order. Many years passed between the first third and the remainder of this pathetic rant.

The 68^th surah would be a rational contender since it was named Al-Qalam | The Pen. But, should it be, then Allah has redefined morality, such that the revised paradigm included pedophilia and rape, terrorism and mass murder, kidnapping and enslaving, thievery and lying, ignorance and illiteracy too.

Quran 068.001 “Nun. By the pen and that which they write.

Quran 068.002 You are not, by the Rabbi’s grace, a possessed madman.

Quran 068.003 And Lo! For you will be an unending reward.

Quran 068.004 And Lo! Verily, you are on an exalted standard of character of sublime morality.

Quran 068.005 You will see, and they will see,

Quran 068.006 who is afflicted with madness.

Quran 068.007 Verily, your Lord knows better who have gone astray from His way, and He knows those who are guided.

Quran 068.008 So obey not the deniers and rejecters.

Quran 068.009 They would have you compromise and relent, so that thy may be pliant.

Quran 068.010 And obey not a contemptible swearer or feeble oath-monger,

Quran 068.011 Slanderer, backbiter, defamer, going about with slander and calumnies,

Quran 068.012 Hinderer of good, a transgressor, a malcontent,

Quran 068.013 Crude and cruel, greedy and violent, mean, intrusive, bastards,

Quran 068.014 Because he had wealth and children.

179Quran 068.015 When our revelations you recite to him, he says, ‘These are fables of long ago.’

Quran 068.016 We will brand him on the nose.”

The Islamic un-god doesn’t just contradict himself, he annuls the testimony of his messenger, voiding his purpose. Muhammad admitted that he was possessed, and he was clearly so mad he wanted to kill himself – but Allah wasn’t paying attention.

However, this cannot be the second revelation because Allah is already engaged in the Never-Ending Argument, condemning Muhammad’s rivals by calling them “afflicted and mad, led astray, disobeying rejectors and deniers. Since neither Allah nor Muhammad has explained the Islamic way or conveyed a message, it would be premature to condemn anyone.

What kind of spirit, before providing any moral guidance to anyone, spews out this kind of vitriol, calling humans “contemptible swearers, feeble oath-mongers, slanderers, backbiters, defamers, transgressors, and malcontents who are crude and cruel, greedy, and intrusive bastards” who deserve to be “branded on the nose” because they have correctly assessed the Quran was “comprised of fables from long ago?” If this was the second revelation, the world would have been better off without a third.

Since we will chronicle the 74^th surah toward the conclusion of this chapter, let’s see if the 73^rd is a credible contender for the second of 114 surahs. The Al-Muzzammil | Bundled Up seems sufficiently cowardly and unappealing.

Quran 073.001 “O you who wrapped in garments!

Quran 073.002 Stand all night, but not all night.

Quran 073.003 Half of it, or a little less

Quran 073.004 Or a little more, and recite the Quran in a slow style, perhaps rhythmically.

180Quran 073.005 Lo, We shall send down to you a weighty word.

Quran 073.006 Verily, the rising by night is very hard and most potent and good for governing, and most suitable for the word, when the soul is most receptive.

Quran 073.007 Verily, there is for you by day prolonged ordinary occupation.”

The old man bundled up and tucked in his bed with his prayer blankie is supposed to recite the Quran slowly. Since Muhammad claimed that “Enwrapped” was the second recital received, and since the initial revelation contained 34 words, only 17 of which were nouns and verbs, with 11 of them repeated, conjoined with 17 conjunctions, articles, prepositions, and pronouns, he would be reciting at a blistering pace of one word every 48 minutes. If pared of redundancy, it would be one word every hour or so.

Under such conditions, do you suppose that this would be sufficiently memorizing to stupefy the masses: “Read in-the-name of-your-Lord who-created, has-created man from-a-blood-clot. Read! And-your-Lord is-most-bountiful, who-taught by-the-pen, taught man what-he-did-not-know?”

If Islam were not opposed to music, and if a composer and orchestra could be found among the Lord’s slaves, perhaps they could outdo their god and write and perform a soaring classical score to roar each word into relevance. But even then, I don’t suppose seasoned citizens swaying in a retirement home could move slowly enough to properly reflect the rhythm and beat.

But that is trivial compared to nocturnal devotion. The Quran was revealed in darkness, and night is the best time to ponder its meaning – when the soul is most receptive. Satan is the Prince of Darkness, and evil loves the night. We have stumbled upon another clue.

And speaking of clues, we have another contradiction. In the Hadith, Muhammad was a recluse, hiding in caves 181and sleeping during the day. He was the furthest thing from a businessman. So, who is lying – Muhammad or Allah?

Quran 073.008 “But keep in remembrance the name of your Lord and devote yourself to Him in complete devotion.”

How can one remember the name of a Lord who has not yet been named? And how is devotion possible when suicide is preferable?

Quran 073.009 “Lord of the East and West: la ilaha illa huwa | there is no god but He. So take Him alone for Disposer of Affairs.

Quran 073.010 And bear patiently what they say and avoid them with a becoming avoidance, keeping away from them.”

The Lord of the East is Satan. There is no other Devil but he, the ultimate Disposer of Affairs. And of course, following his advice would make Muhammad the only messenger who was told to avoid his audience.

Ishaq:115 “Now Muhammad did not want his secret to be divulged before he applied himself to the publication of his message.” In other words, he needed time to create enough of these rhyming surahs to make his claim seem believable.

Quran 073.011 “Leave Me (alone to deal with) the rejecters, the possessors of ease and comfort. Give them respite for a while.

Quran 073.012 Verily, We have heavy fetters with Us (to bind them), and a roaring furnace (to burn them),

Quran 073.013 And food that chokes, sticking in the throat, and a painful torment.”

While we haven’t been formally introduced, Muhammad’s spirit seems all too familiar. The Lord of rejection and oppression who chokes the life out of men, and who will endure an anguishing punishment, is Satan.

Nothing moral or beneficial has been revealed thus far. The Quran is but a paragraph long and its non-prophet has been told to avoid discussing it.

182This means that Muhammad, himself, was being rejected. Even the punishment awaiting the “possessors of ease and plenty” tells us that the wannabe prophet was tormented by his relative poverty.

Covetous of what belongs to others, his inward anguish turns sadistic. The heavy fetters, roaring furnaces, and choking torments are a way of lashing out at those he envies. At this early juncture, there is no other plausible explanation. Either Muhammad was deeply disturbed, wanting to torture men without justification, or his deity was unjust and perverted. As such, the “Enwrapped” surah unravels Islam’s moral authority.

Ishaq:155 “The revelations stopped for some time so that the Apostle was distressed and grieved. Then Gabriel brought him the ‘Morning,’ in which he swore that he had not forsaken him and did not hate him.”

The following insight is from al-Maududi’s Tafhimu’l-Qur’an: “The surah’s theme is to console the Prophet and remove his anxiety, which had been caused by the suspension of revelation. By swearing an oath by the morning and night, he was reassured. Then, he was given the good news that the hardships he was experiencing in the initial stage of his mission would not last long. Soon, Allah would bless him so abundantly that he would be pleased.” While this is nonsense, it’s important that we understand the Muslim perspective.

In reality, however, Muhammad hadn’t suffered any hardships on account of his mission up to this point because it did not exist. All that had happened thus far had been a bout in a cave with an angry spirit, a nonsensical revelation, some panic, Khadija’s scheme, a blind man’s blessing, and a little boasting around town. But Muslims, needing an excuse for their wannabe prophet’s morose and suicidal behavior, were willing to contradict Allah’s revelation to give their hero an alibi.

Let’s dive into the surah so you’ll see what I mean.

183Quran 093.001 “I swear by the early hours of the day,

Quran 093.002 And the night when dark and still.

Quran 093.003 Your Lord hath not forsaken thee, nor doth He despiseth thee.”

Whoa. Time out. Why the King James 17^th-century Elizabethan English? Do you suppose the words “thy, hath, forsaken, thee,” and “doth despiseth” are being used in these translations to make the Quran seem Biblical? Just speculation on my part, but for readability’s sake, I’ll endeavor from now on to make the “Lord’s” words more intelligible. So, let’s move on, now that we doth verily know that the Lord doth sweareth but hath not forsaken. Although it beith a mystery why he doth despiseth thee not or whence he loveth the darkness.

From this point forward, when we read an edict in the Quran ordering Muslims to honor the orphan or nurture the wellbeing of the poor person, we know that Muhammad is the intended beneficiary.

Quran 093.004 “Surely what comes after is better for you than the present.

Quran 093.005 For your Lord gives to you so you shall be well pleased.

Quran 093.006 Did He not find you an orphan and give you a refuge?

Quran 093.007 And find you lost and perplexed, unaware, and show you the way?

Quran 093.008 Did He not find you poor and made you rich?”

The pickings were slim in Petra. So much so that the Lord was reduced to bribing his non-prophet.

As for the rest of this, it’s the age-old ploy of religion: Sure, your life is miserable now, but if you play along and don’t rebel, it will be better in the hereafter. Of course, by that time it is always too late.

184Muhammad’s childhood was miserable, so Allah was mistaken about the refuge. And he remains as lost as ever, because there had been no enlightenment. And surely, Hell’s Warden didn’t think that the blood-clot revelation was guidance. Muhammad could barely find his way home. And if the Lord had already enriched Muhammad, why is his present so bleak? Or better question, since Muhammad endured the childhood from hell, how was he protected? Is the un-god’s memory failing? Or is Muhammad’s spirit endorsing Khadija’s Profitable Profit Plan? “He found you poor and made you rich?”



This may be as a good a place as any to share my interpretation of the Gospel according to Khadija: “Stick with me, kid, and I’ll make this prophet gig profitable.” It makes more sense than this coming from God.

Having married money twice and climbed the social ladder of Petra, Khadija was in trouble. Her fortunes were dwindling while her absentee husband/employee brooded his life away being a religious recluse in caves. Having made a fortune selling trinkets to hajj pilgrims at the pagan fairs surrounding the Ka’aba, Khadija knew all about religious scams. So she had motive, means, and opportunity. What’s more, her behavior was consistent with my theory.

According to Aisha’s testimony in the Hadith, and Ishaq’s in the Sira, Khadija was the real founder of Islam. Muhammad believed he had been possessed by a demon. He was scared to death. She converted him to Islam, usurping her nearly dead cousin’s credibility. Remember what she said: “No, never. It can’t be. Be happy. I swear by Allah that He shall never humiliate you. Truly, I hope you will be the Prophet of this people. Allah will not bring you to shame.” I’m 185surprised she didn’t go on to cite: Quran 093.008 Did He not find you poor and made you rich?”

Let’s review what we know thus far. The caravan business Khadija owned owed its prosperity to Allah’s recently restored pagan rock shrine. It stood not more than a hundred meters from where this conversation took place. Petra provided one of the few watering holes for caravans moving goods from the ports of the Red Sea to the Mediterranean. While that was good, no one became rich caring for folks passing through town.

So, in its fallen state, the Ka’aba became Petra’s meager meal ticket, erected as it was out of the crumbling stones which had served as relics of a time long past. Muhammad’s great, great, great grandfather, Qusayy, had gained control over the idol temple and organized an annual pilgrimage to the shrine. He collected a tax from every Arab attendee. While a religious tax was a profitable idea, and one that made its way into Islam, the series of economic fairs Qusayy arranged surrounding the hajj proved to be his most capitalistic venture.

Papa Muttalib, Muhammad’s grandfather, the one who sacrificed camels to the Ka’aba’s idols at a sorceress’s urging, ultimately gained control over the concession to feed and water the pilgrims. He became the recipient of the religious tax, something that made him even richer. As the Ka’aba’s custodian, he pocketed coin charging Arab chiefs rent for housing their sacred stones. He charged them more for visitation rights, and still more for their gods’ care – feeding, watering, and dusting services. The combination served to make the merchants of Petra rich by Bedouin standards, anyway.

Khadija was a beneficiary. So she told Muhammad, “Better than being the Ka’aba’s custodian; you are Allah’s Prophet. And that’s more prestigious and profitable than being a recluse, my dear.” A Hadith entitled, “Khadija the First to 186Believe,” contained these incriminating lines: “Muhammad was to tell them of his Lord’s bounty to himself: ‘Of the bounty of your Lord let your discourse be.’” This was followed by: “Thereupon the Messenger began to proclaim Allah’s bounty to himself.”

Ishaq’s Sira reports: Ishaq:155 “Khadija was the first to believe in Allah and His Apostle. By her Allah lightened the burden on His Prophet. He never met with contradiction and charges of falsehood but he was comforted by her when he went home. She strengthened him and belittled the opposition.”

Khadija believed in Allah before Muhammad did because Allah was her meal ticket. And while she conceived the prophet idea, she had to endure a great deal just to keep “god’s messenger” going. His “contradictions” prompted “charges of falsehood.”

We have already discovered these echoing throughout the Hadith. So Khadija “belittled the opposition.” This made her the inspiration for the Quran’s overwhelming propensity to condemn Muhammad’s opponents, threatening them with doom.

Testimony in support of the Profitable Prophet Plan can be found throughout Tabari’s History. Tabari VI:82 “During the Jahiliyyah I came to Mecca and stayed with Abbas bin Muttalib. The sun rose while I was looking at the Ka’aba. A young man [Muhammad] came up and gazed at the sky. He turned to face the Ka’aba. Soon after, a woman [Khadija] and a youth [Ali] came and stood behind him.

The young man bowed and the woman and youth bowed; then the man stood erect, followed by the woman and youth. The young man prostrated himself, and they did the same. Abbas asked, ‘Do you know what this is?’ ‘No,’ I answered. ‘This is Khadija, my nephew’s wife. He has told me that his Lord has commanded them to do what you see them doing.

Allah’s oath, I do not know anyone on the face of the earth but these three who follow this religion.’ I asked Abbas, ‘What is this religion?’ He answered, ‘This is Muhammad bin Abdallah, who 187claims that Allah has sent him as His Messenger with this religion and that the treasures of Chusroes and Caesar will be given to him by conquest.’”

This is an incriminating confession. It is an admission of guilt – proof that Islam was created by a wannabe profiteer. So I’d like to linger on this Hadith a moment longer because I’m surprised the Islamic scriptures would confess to the Profitable Prophet Plan so openly. This is the first explanation of the motivation behind Muhammad’s religion. And we’re told that it was conceived to steal treasure through conquest. While this is confirmed countless times in Yathrib, we are still in Petra, just three partial surahs into the Quran. And Tabari’s Hadith does not stand alone. Ishaq reveals a similar Tradition.

Ishaq:113 “When I was a merchant I came to Mecca during the hajj pilgrimage. While I was there a man came out to pray and stood facing the Ka’aba. Then a woman and a boy came out and stood praying with him.

I asked, ‘What is their religion? It is something new to me.’ Abbas said, ‘This is Muhammad who alleges that Allah has sent him with it so that the treasures of Chusroes and Caesar will be open to him. The woman is his wife Khadija who believes in him.’”

The original motivation for Islam was greed. The Profitable Prophet Plan has been confirmed by the Hadith, Sira, and Quran. A false prophet composed situational scriptures for money.

However, the con got off to a rocky start. Muhammad impugned his credibility. Rome had long since been plundered, so the last Caesar had been sandals up for centuries. And you may be wondering why Muhammad would covet Chusroes’ treasure. I did some digging and found that he was Khosrow Parviz, a Persian King, the last great Sasanian shah of Iran, and contemporary of Muhammad (ruling from 590 to 628 CE). In 626 CE, adjusted for today’s dollars, he had stashed away over $2 billion in silver and gold. His annual income exceeded 188$700 million. Relative to others of his day, he was the richest man alive.

In Bukhari, we find another confession of guilt: Bukhari:V4B52N267 “The Prophet said, ‘Khosrau will be ruined, and there will be no Khosrau after him, and Caesar will surely be ruined and there will be no Caesar after him, and you will spend their treasures in Allah’s Cause [Jihad].’”

And, Bukhari:V4B56N793 “The Prophet said, ‘If you live long enough the treasures of Khosrau will be opened and taken as spoils. You will carry out handfuls of gold and silver.’”

Then, Bukhari:V4B56N795 “I have been given the keys of the treasures of the world by Allah.” Money was the motivation behind Islam.

In this light, let’s examine the remainder of the second revelation of the Profitable Prophet Plan, cognizant that Muhammad was the orphan who was being harassed…

Quran 093.009 “Therefore, treat not the orphan with harshness, or oppress him.

Quran 093.010 Nor repulse the beggar, nor chide the petitioner.

Quran 093.011 But as for the favor your Lord rehearse and announce!”

This also sounds suspicious. Islam’s first two religious covenants are specific to Muhammad. He was an orphan, treated with harshness. He was oppressed, probably molested, as we shall learn later, and had to beg. He was chided as a child and as a man. These things haunted him. It was why he had his god tell those who treated him poorly that it wasn’t nice.

He would get even because his dark spirit was going to make him rich and them poor. Then, in a less-than-godly blunder, Muhammad’s Lord tells his prophet to rehearse the favor that he was supposed to announce. He even 189contradicted himself. The 73^rd surah told Muhammad to avoid such announcements.

If you think I may be too cynical, just wait. Each of the next twenty surahs serves to confirm my theory, one already rife with copious confessions. Thus far, this has all been for the benefit of Muhammad, and punishment and rebuke of all others. He isn’t the last messenger to mankind but, instead, the greatest con among men.

Before we go to the “Lord’s” fourth Quranic gift to man, let’s look at how the non-prophet said these insights came to him. Once again, Aisha, the 50- to 68-year-old non-prophet’s six-year-old “wife,” is the source of Islamic enlightenment. She said, Bukhari:V1B1N2 “‘Allah’s Messenger! How is the Divine Inspiration revealed to you?’

He replied, ‘Sometimes it is like the ringing of a bell. This form of Inspiration is the hardest of all and then this state passes off after I have grasped what is inspired. Sometimes the angel comes in the form of a man and talks to me and I grasp whatever he says.’

Aisha added: ‘I saw the Prophet being inspired and (noticed) the sweat dropping from his forehead on a very cold day as the Inspiration was over.’”

Since the Hadith claims Muhammad only saw Gabriel on two occasions, how did he come upon the remaining 112 surahs? Bukhari:V6B60N378 “Aisha said, ‘Whoever tells you that Muhammad saw his Lord is a liar…and the Prophet only saw Gabriel twice.’”

In Islam’s creation account, we were told that Allah had given up on oral communication and wanted everything in writing with angelic witnesses. Now he turns to an illiterate man and communicates by means of a gong. The god of two billion people ought to be more capable than clanging bells, blood clots, and having to bribe a despondent messenger. Yet that’s all we’ve got thus far.

Unfortunately, no one seems to know what came next. Muslims don’t even know how the surahs were pieced 190together. Early and late revelations are jumbled haphazardly. So the best we can do is to attribute a collection of surahs to the formative period. The 96^th surah is an example as we have witnessed. The first third represents the first verses revealed. The remainder was “received” years later when the prophet began to prostrate himself at the Ka’aba. We’re told that Abu Jahl, Muhammad’s archrival and nemesis, taunted him.

Abul Ala al-Maududi reports: “After his appointment to Prophethood, and before he started preaching Islam, Muhammad began performing the prostration prayer facing Allah’s House the way Allah taught him.”

Surprisingly, this performance was never described in the Quran. Its absence is perplexing. Allah took time to give Muhammad permission to partake in pedophilia, rape, thievery, womanizing, the slave trade, and mass murder but never bothered to explain the nature of the recitals.

The Islamic ideologue, Sayyid Abul Ala Maududi, wrote the following in his Tafhimu’l-Qur’an: “Watching the technique, the Quraysh assumed that he had adopted a new religion. The other people were watching it with curiosity, but Abu Jahl in his arrogance and pride threatened the Prophet and forbade him to worship in that way in the Ka’aba.”

Endeavoring to explain the 96^th surah, brings us a Tradition recorded by al-Maududi which has become popular among Muslims: “Does Muhammad set his face on the ground before you?” When they replied in the affirmative, he said: “By Lat and Uzza, if I ever catch him in that act, I will set my foot on his neck and rub his face in the dust.” Since the Ka’aba was called a mosque – or “a place of prostration in Arabic” – way back in Qusayy’s day, Muhammad didn’t invent face-to-the-ground bowing.

Then…“When he saw the Messenger in the prostration posture, he tried to set his foot on his neck. But suddenly he turned back as if in a fright. Asked what was the matter, he said, ‘There was a ditch of fire and a terrible apparition between me and 191Muhammad.’ On hearing this the Prophet said: ‘Had he come near me, the angels would have smitten him and torn him to pieces.’”

This is intended to be another proof of Muhammad’s calling. The notion that Muhammad’s most annoying rival, after publicly threatening the non-prophet, would admit to seeing a divine sign protecting him, is ludicrous. If it occurred, he might run, he might apologize, he might become a Muslim, but Jahl would never confess to being foiled by the prophet’s deity and then remain an adversary. Unless, of course, he saw the fire as a symbol of the Devil’s influence in the prophet’s proclamation.

Testifying further, we read…

“According to lbn Abbas, Abu Jahl said: ‘If I caught Muhammad performing his Prayer by the Ka’bah, I would trample his neck down.’ When the Holy Prophet heard of it, he said: If he acted so, the angels would seize him there and then?’ (Bukhari, Tirmidhi, Nasai, Ibn Jarir, Abdur Razzaq, Abd bin Humaid, Ibn al- Mundhir, Ibn Marduyah).”

“According to another tradition from Ibn Abbas, the Holy Prophet was performing his Prayer at the Maqam Ibrahim. Abu Jahl passed that way and said: ‘Muhammad, did I not forbid you this, and then he started to threaten him.’ In reply the Prophet rebuked him severely. Thereupon he said: ‘Muhammad, on what strength do you rebuke me? By God, my followers in this valley far exceed yours in number.’ (Ahmad, Tirmidhi, Nasai, Ibn Jarir, lbn Abi Shaibah, Ibn al-Mundhir, Tabarani, Ibn Marduyah).”

This time the scene was recast without the embarrassing reference to the pit of flames. But that hardly gets the revisionists out of the fire. It would be some time before Muhammad would reveal his god’s name. And by their own admission, there were only three Muslims in a town of several thousand.

It got a bit gross from there…

Bukhari:V4B53N409 “Narrated 'Abdullah: While the Prophet was in the state of prostration, surrounded by a group of people 192from Quraish pagans. Uqba bin Abi Muait came and brought the intestines of a camel and threw them on the back of the Prophet.

The Prophet did not raise his head from prostration till Fatima (i.e. his daughter) came and removed those intestines from his back, and invoked evil on whoever had done (the evil deed).

The Prophet said, ‘O Allah! Destroy the chiefs of Quraish, O Allah! Destroy Abu jahl bin Hisham, Utba bin Rabia, Shaiba bin Rabia. Uqba bin Abi Muait Umaiya bin Khalaf.’

Later on I saw all of them killed during the battle of Badr and their bodies were thrown into a well except the body of Umaiya or Ubai, because he was a fat person, and when he was pulled, the parts of his body got separated before he was thrown into the well.”

With the Hadith providing the necessary context, let’s review what Muhammad’s Rabbi had to say...

Quran 096.006 Nay! Verily, man is rebellious and inordinate,

Quran 096.007 Because he sees himself independent, sufficient,

Quran 096.008 Lo! Unto your Lord is your return.

Quran 096.009 Have you seen him who forbids and restrains,

Quran 096.010 A slave when he prays?

Quran 096.011 Tell me, if he is on the guidance?

Quran 096.012 Or enjoins piety and guarding?

Quran 096.013 Tell me if he denies and turns away?

Quran 096.014 Knows he not that God sees?

Quran 096.015 Nay, If ceases not, We will catch him by the forelock,

Quran 096.016 A lying, sinful forelock!

Quran 096.017 Then, let him call upon his henchmen.

Quran 096.018 We will call the guards of Hell.

Quran 096.019 Nay! Do not obey him. Fall prostrate and draw nigh.”

193This serves as proof that the Quran cannot be understood without the Hadith. I would go so far as to say that both the opening and concluding segments of the first surah revealed are senseless without the Sunnah explanations. And with the Hadith, they are repulsive.

Of the four or five candidates for the second revelation, the 74^th surah is similar to the last two pronouncements, so let’s review it next. Al-Muddaththir | The Enfolded reveals…

Quran 074.001 “O you enveloped and covered up,

Quran 074.002 Arise and warn!

Quran 074.003 And your Lord magnify,

Quran 074.004 And your garments free from stain!

Quran 074.005 And banish trepidation and Ar-Rujz | ?,

Quran 074.006 And give not a thing in order to have more,

Quran 074.007 And for the sake of your Lord, be patient.”

Once again, the non-prophet who became Terror of Yathrib, was hiding under the covers. And yet his seizing, smiting, and dragging Lord wanted him to deliver a warning. That’s quite a picture. And while they are at odds now, frightful and frightened, terrorist and terrorized, this will change. Like Lord, like Messenger. Soon, they will be inseparable and indistinguishable.

But so as to pretty it up, the “Lord,” ever fascinated with meaningless details, tells Muhammad to dress for success – to keep his clothes clean. And he listened, at least according to Will Durant. In his Story of Civilization, he says Muhammad “was vain. He gave considerable time to his personal appearance – perfumed his body, painted his eyes, dyed his hair, and wore a ring inscribed ‘Muhammad the Messenger of Allah.’” Later Hadiths will confirm each of Durant’s charges.

194Up to this point, I have been remiss in divulging something exceedingly embarrassing, indeed, indicting. The Arabic word for Lord used throughout the Quran is the same word chosen by rabbis to exult themselves – rabb and rabbi.

The Quran’s opening statement was conveyed in Hebrew. It reads: i-qa’ra’ bi-s’mi rabb-ika. The Hebrew basis is qara’ ba shem rab. Qara’ means “to invite and summon, to meet and welcome, to call out and greet, and to read and recite.” This exceedingly important verb is used throughout the Towrah to invite us to meet with Yahowah during the Miqra’ey, which comprise the means to eternal life, perfection, adoption, enrichment, empowerment, and reconciliation, leading to camping out with God. Qara’ was then misappropriated by Allah as the name for his abysmal Quran.

In the opening statement, qara’ means “read,” ba means “in,” shem means “name,” and rabbika would be rendered “like a great rabbinical master.” However, since Arabic is a derivative of Hebrew, using its alphabet, Lord should have been written ‘adon or ba’al. So, the realization that the rabbis in Petra and Yathrib who provided Muhammad with Talmud recitals, and those in Baghdad who contributed to the final formulation of the Quran as literate scribes and theologians, substituted their title.

And in this case, the rabbi are to be magnified and exalted. I’m sure they got a chuckle out of that one. But are they laughing now?

You likely noticed that I made no attempt to translate “Ar-Rujz | ?” Some linguists suggest that it means “pollution,” while others claim “idols.” I have also found references to “deeds deserving punishment” which many render as “sins.”

Confusion and vanity aside, I find the edict to “give not a thing in order to have more” hilarious considering that it 195followed Allah’s promise to make Muhammad rich – which he did exclusively through stealing. Furthermore, Allah has offered Muslims nothing for their lives.

Even Quran 074.007 “and for the sake of your Lord, be patient” is an exceedingly odd thing to say. The inference is that the Lord was new at this revelation stuff and that it would take him a while to get into a grove. So be patient with him as he stumbles his way through the initial recitals.

The next verse continues a trend that will grow into the most demented ever conceived in a religious genre. Paraphrased: “God hates us and can’t wait to introduce us to a hell he has made for our hospitality.”

While heaven and hell are concepts he borrowed from many others, Muhammad makes one decadent and the other demented.

Quran 074.008 “Then when the trumpet is sounded,

Quran 074.009 Surely that day will be of anguish,

Quran 074.010 Not at ease for disbelievers.

Quran 074.011 Leave Me alone to deal with the creature whom I created bare and alone!”

As a result of our previous investigations of the Quran, we are familiar with the notion of a trumpet announcing the Day of Doom. On which, according to Allah, the bodies of all unbelievers, some 100 billion infidels, are to be reconstructed and resurrected so that Allah can torture them. By alluding to it here, in what is among the first handful of revelations, without first having provided the means to avoid being tortured, suggests that tormenting men and women is actually Allah’s prime objective.

The Snake from the Garden who slithered into the desert and envenomated this suicidal quivering excuse for a man, is reprising the ploy he used with Chawah – I suppose because the Serpent sees a lot of her in him. And in that it worked 4,600 years prior, Satan is using the same 196strategy, which is to misappropriate and misconstrue Yahowah’s instructions. And that is what is happening here beside the terrified would-be troubadour.

Islam’s Lord is aware that Yahowah defines our current mission, which is to prepare Yisra’el for His return on Yowm Kipurym | the Day of Reconciliations in year 6000 Yah / sunset in Jerusalem, October 2^nd, 2033, using the symbolism of a Showphar | Trumpet. On Taruw’ah, which is the day this mission commenced in 2001, days after the Islamic suicide bombings of 09.11.01, we began by exposing and condemning Muhammad and Allah, their Quran and Hadith, to warn the world about the toxicity of this destructive and deadly plague. This then led to Yada Yahowah, where we collaborated to awaken Yisra’el and Yahuwdah to the truth about Yahowah so that God’s people are prepared for their Family Reunion.

This is what ha Satan | the Adversary is attempting to foil with his Day of Doom. If he can cower and kill Jews to the extent that they forego this opportunity, there would be no reason for Yahowah to return, leaving a decimated planet for Satan to lord over.

I have fought against the rhetoric of this Devil many times. Five years after contending with him while writing Prophet of Doom, I confronted Satan again while composing the first edition of Questioning Paul, now revised and renamed Twistianity. Having returned to augment it as I am now doing here in God Damn Religion, both dissertations on this Adversary have grown to five volumes.

While Paul was similarly demon-possessed and sinister, he was a literate and clever rabbi. As such, even though the tactics were similar to those the Snake deployed in the Garden, the Christian New Testament is a vastly more sophisticated adaptation of Satan’s principal ploy, in 197which he positions himself as if he were God by misappropriating and misrepresenting the words of God.

My next bout with the Lord of Delusion came about unexpectedly. Several years ago, I sought to conclude my review of the books scribed in Babel | the Confounding Commingling in Babylon by assessing Ezekiel. To my surprise, it proved to be Satan’s autobiography and playbook. It was there that I witnessed this Snake’s fixation on annihilating Jews, even despoiling the wombs of Jewish women. He would even threaten to resurrect an army composed of dry bones to do his bidding, which was to rise above Yahowah while placing his gaudy trophy atop Moriah. In the Devil’s revisionist version of his anticipated day of destiny, there would be the cannibalistic Feast of the Beast, where God’s Son, Dowd | David, was on the menu, along with his Herald. The Adversary’s Day of Doom was slated to replace Yahowah’s Day of Reconciliations in an attempt to forestall Yahowah’s return to His people.

So, you see, I have read the Snake’s playbooks, and I recognize the acts and the actors. Forewarned is forearmed, so while I’m just a mortal man against an immortal beast, I have been equipped with the Seven Spirits of Yahowah such that we will prevail over this beast and the Family Reunion will be well-attended. Join us.

As we move deeper into this surah, Satan, ever desirous of controlling everything, claims credit for human ingenuity and success. And this is odd since he has been unable to replicate it among Muslims even as it thrives among disbelievers.

Quran 074.012 “And then granted wealth and vast riches,

Quran 074.013 And sons to be by his side.

Quran 074.014 And made things comfortable for them.”

This Snake cannot endure the thought that men and women have value and can be productive. In the Serpent’s 198view, the creation of mankind was a colossal mistake – one he seeks to rectify by enslaving and killing everyone. Then he intends to torture those who didn’t capitulate, showing them who is Lord.

All Allah has afforded his slaves has been to provide them with a reason to die killing disbelievers. Islam is a death cult. Ultimately, Allah is ticked off – an angry and frustrated Snake. After contributing to Judaism, Christianity, Islam, and Progressive Socialist Humanism, and ensnaring 90% of the planet in his coils, envenomating them, it just isn’t enough. Israel still exists and Jews remain. And therefore, he is out of options. There is no venom left in his fangs. He has read Yahowah’s script and he knows that he is going to lose.

Particularly embarrassing for the once brilliant Karuwb of Gan ‘Eden, he is being foiled by an old man, a gowy no less. And so now you know why this book devoted to exposing and condemning this Snake was named Satanic ~ Allah’s Delusions of Grandeur.

Strike as he might, one man, filled with the antidote, has been protected by a loyal host of mal’ak | spiritual implements. Yahowah chose and equipped him, giving him an uncommon ability to be observant and discerning, such that his outreach to the Chosen People resonates with a remnant. It is all to ensure that Yowm Kipurym is announced, appreciated, attended, and accepted. This spells success for Yisra’el and the demise of the Serpent – along with all of his religious and political stooges.

In a world of believers, there would be an observant thinker, encouraging more of the same. And that would be sufficient to ruin the Devil’s agenda.

Quran 074.015 “After all that he wants that I should give more.

Quran 074.016 Never. Nay! Verily, he has been stubborn, opposing Our signs and proofs.

199Quran 074.017 I shall inflict on him hardship. I will impose a severe torment and fearful doom, a distressing punishment to overtake him.

Quran 074.018 Verily, he had thought, considered, and then calculated.

Quran 074.019 So may he be cursed, and destroyed. Woe to him, how he plotted and planned.

Quran 074.020 And more, let him be cursed, how he plotted.

Quran 074.021 Then he looked around and thought,

Quran 074.022 Then he frowned and puckered his brow, scowling in displeasure.

Quran 074.023 Then he turned back and was proud.

Quran 074.024 And said, ‘This is nothing but magical enchantment narrated from others.

Quran 074.025 This is nothing but the word of a mortal.

Quran 074.026 I will cast him into the Hell-Fire!

Quran 074.027 And what will make you know exactly what Hell-Fire is?

Quran 074.028 It leaves nothing and spares naught.

Quran 074.029 Burning the skins, scorching the mortal.

Quran 074.030 Over it are nineteen.

Quran 074.031 And We have set none but angels as guardians of the Fire, and We have fixed their number only as a contentious trial for the disbelievers, in order that the people of the Scripture Book may arrive at a certainty and the believers may increase in Faith and that no doubts may be left for the people of the Book and the believers, and that those skeptics and infidels in whose hearts is a disease and the disbelievers may say: ‘What does God intend by this example and parable?’

Thus, this is how God leads astray whom He wills and guides whom He wills. And none can know the armies of your Lord save He. And this is nothing else than a reminder to mankind.

Quran 074.032 Nay, I swear by the Moon.”

200That was a hell of a mean-spirited rant, even by Satan’s standards. And to have tipped his cards this early into the game of revealing his Quran suggests that he genuinely believes that people are too blind and dumb, too easily frightened and controlled, to see him for the Devil – even though he has made it obvious to all but the oblivious.

And while I’m not here to offer Satan advice, he would have been more convincing if he had chosen a literate and intelligent accomplice, or baring that, had hired a ghostwriter. For example, Satan’s little helpers working on The Noble Quran added everything within the parentheticals to clarify their Lord’s intent:

Quran 074.030-31 “Over it are nineteen (angels as guardians and keepers of Hell). And We have set none but angels as guardians of the Fire, and We have fixed their number (19) only as a contentious trial for the disbelievers, in order that the people of the Scripture Book (Jews and Christians) may arrive at a certainty (that this Quran is the truth as it agrees with their Books i.e. their number (19) is written in the Taurat (Torah) and the Injeel (Gospel)) and the believers may increase in Faith (as this Quran is the truth) and that no doubts may be left for the people of the Scripture Book and the believers, and that those skeptics and infidels in whose hearts is a disease (of hypocrisy) and the disbelievers may say: ‘What does God intend by this (curious) example and parable?’ Thus, this is how God leads astray whom He wills and guides whom He wills. And none can know the armies of your Lord save He. And this (Hell) is nothing else than a (warning) reminder to mankind.”

Methinks they made it worse, not better.

Picking up the frustrated tale of woe screeched by Hell’s Warden where we left off, we find that the Rock of the Ka’aba was calling the Moon as a witness…

Quran 074.032 “Nay, I swear by the Moon,

Quran 074.033 And by the night when it withdraws,

Quran 074.034 And by the dawn when it is unveiled,

201Quran 074.035 Lo! Verily, this is one of the greatest,

Quran 074.036 A warning to mankind,

Quran 074.037 To you going forward or remaining behind,

Quran 074.038 Every soul is pledged for what it does or earns,

Quran 074.039 Except those on the right hand,

Quran 074.040 In Gardens they will ask each other,

Quran 074.041 Of Evil-Doers, Disbelievers, and Polytheists

Quran 074.042 ‘What has brought you to Hell?’

Quran 074.043 They will say, ‘We did not fulfill our prayers,

Quran 074.044 Nor did we feed the wretched indigent,

Quran 074.045 And we waded with waders vainly,

Quran 074.046 And we used to deny the Day of Judgment,

Quran 074.047 Until there came to us the inevitable.’

Quran 074.048 So, no intercession of intercessors will avail.

Quran 074.049 Why now turn they away from admonition

Quran 074.050 As if they were frightened asses

Quran 074.051 Fleeing from a lion, or beast hunting them?

Quran 074.052 Nay, every one of them desires that he should be given pages spread out!

Quran 074.053 Nay! By no means. They fear not the hereafter.

Quran 074.054 Nay! Verily. Lo! This is an admonition.

Quran 074.055 So whoever will may heed.

Quran 074.056 And they will not heed unless God wills. He is worthy of being feared. He is the fount of mercy.”

A spirit who swears by the Moon is neither God nor monotheistic. One who swears by the night is likely demonic and is not enlightening. As for the Dawn, it is embedded in Satan’s name – Halal ben Shachar | the Arrogance of the Rising Sun.

202Allah is not akbar | greater, although that is his ambition. He does not warn humankind but, instead, threatens. And the only way to move forward is away from Lords and unto Yahowah. In this regard, we benefit from what Father and Son have provided by fulfilling the Miqra’ey and do not receive what we would earn.

As proof that Satan’s little helpers in Babylon were clueless as to when the righty exemption was inserted into this early surah, they do not even venture an explanation. Further, there is no demarcation between the Islamic Heaven and Hell, with the slaves and disbelievers adjacent to one another and engaged in conversation. Apart from those who relish the suffering of others, this would make Heaven Hell.

And in Hell, the Unbelievers are the only ones capable of articulating Islamic doctrine, which should give Muslims pause. Should you not buy into the whole predestination mantra of lefties and righties, then the Lord, through Hell’s Witnesses, would frighten his slaves into prostrating themselves to him in submission. And as for the wretched indigent looking to be fed his share of devotion, you’ll find him quivering under the covers.

This all leads to denying the Day of Doom, the crime of crimes and ultimate insult to Satan. He must replace Yowm Kipurym with his version or he is finished. So, this is not Judgment Day for humankind but for him.

The Snake would have his slaves believe that the Day of Resurrection and Doom is inevitable – predestined, because without it, he’s off to Hell. And to make his revisionist plan prevail, he must foreclose on the work of our intercessor – Dowd – the Messiah and Son of God who became our Savior by fulfilling Pesach | Passover, Matsah | UnYeasted Bread, and Bikuwrym | Firstborn Children leading to Shabuw’ah | the Promise of Seven.

203Obviously frustrated that he, while prevailing with many, is failing with Jews, says of those he will describe as assess, that they are running away from the lion – Dowd, who is the Lion of Judah. Unable to compete, the Snake slips out of costume and admits the obvious – the Devil cannot produce a book. Satan must work through the very men he is demeaning to transform this rabid rant into a written text. “Nay, every one of them desires that he should be given pages spread out! Nay! By no means.”

The horror of it all. Such a simple thing and, yet, the Snake had no Pen. All he could do was threaten: “They fear not the hereafter. Nay! Verily, this is a warning. So whoever will may heed. And they will not heed unless God wills. He is worthy of being feared.”

As for being “the fount of mercy,” after slipping out of first-person plural to third-person singular to say “he is worthy of being feared,” it’s the schizophrenia surfacing.

It is hard to believe that there is yet another candidate for the Quran’s second revelation, the fifth we have considered. Thus far, each one has combined elements that fit and many that prove otherwise. Of the surah conveniently named, Ash-Sharh | The Opening Up, the 20^th-century Quran expositor, idealogue, and terrorist, Sayyid Abul Ala al-Maududi, explained: “No sooner had Muhammad started preaching Islam than the same society which had esteemed him, turned hostile. The relatives and friends, clansmen and neighbors, who treated him with respect, began to shower him with abuse. No one in Mecca was prepared to listen to him; he was ridiculed and mocked in the street, so the initial stage was very discouraging. That is why surah 94 was sent down to console him.”

Before we dive into the surah of primitive surgery, I’d like to share a Hadith from Ibn Ishaq to demonstrate how reluctant Muhammad was to discuss the relationship he had formed with his demonic spirit…

Ishaq:117 “Three years elapsed from the time that Muhammad concealed his state until Allah commanded him to 204publish his religion according to information that has reached me. ‘Proclaim what you have been ordered and turn away from the polytheists.’ (Quran 015.094)

‘Warn your family, your nearest relations.’ (Quran 026.214) When these words came down to the Apostle he said, ‘Allah has ordered me to warn my family and the task is beyond my strength.

When I make my message known to them, I will meet with great unpleasantness so I have kept silent. But Gabriel has told me that if I do not do as ordered my Lord will punish me.’”

This Hadith is injurious to Islam. The surahs it references (the 15^th and 26^th) were not among the first fifty revealed, so the timing is impossible. Further, Khadija was the first Muslim and Ali was the third. Muhammad’s only other family members were daughters, and in Islam, they don’t count. So, what was the “great unpleasantness” he feared almost as much as his Lord abusing him? Moreover, imagine a “prophet” so incapacitated by fear that he has to be threatened to deliver the message. Even Muslims deserve something better than this. Or, perhaps not, considering what they have said and done over the years.

Quran 094.001 “Have We not opened up your chest,

Quran 094.002 And removed your burden,

Quran 094.003 Which weighed down your back,

Quran 094.004 And raised your frame.”

Muhammad claimed that the Sharh Sadr occurred on three occasions. According to Islamic theory, his chest was cut open by the angels; his heart was removed, washed, and then reinserted. However, that is not what this says here, because this time, Muhammad’s unsightly hunchback was being straightened by the operation. Remember this from the 3rd chapter: Tabari IX:157 “The Messenger was neither tall nor short. He had a large head and beard with big black eyes. His palms and feet were calloused; he had large joints, his face was white with a reddish tinge, his chest hair was long, and when he walked, he bent forward as if he were descending a slope.”

205Since an unsightly receiver of revelations and crippled messenger isn’t particularly appealing, Babel’s scribes foisted this alternative…

Tabari VI:75 “‘Messenger, how did you first know with absolute certainty that you were a prophet?’ He replied, ‘Two angels came to me while I was somewhere in Mecca…. One angel said, “Open his breast and take out his heart.”

He opened my chest and heart, removing the pollution of Satan and a clot of blood, and threw them away. Then one said, “Wash his breast as you would a receptacle.” He summoned the Sakinah [the Hebrew Shekhinah is exclusively a rabbinic and religious term], which looked like the face of a white cat, and it was placed in my heart. Then one said, “Sew up his breast.” So they sewed up my chest and placed the seal between my shoulders.’”

While none of this occurred, Islam didn’t escape the operation unscathed. If God wished to cleanse a man’s spirit of sin, He wouldn’t do open heart surgery. Moreover, Shekhinah is a rabbinical concept conceived to control the Almighty, placing the religious Lord wherever he served the rabbinical interests. And since there is no mention of the Shekhinah in the Torah or Prophets, this is yet another indication of Muhammad and his Rabbi’s dependence upon rabbinical sources for their scriptural insights.

This is not the first time we have encountered this embarrassing blunder. In the Dishonest Abe chapter of Snake in the Desert, we addressed the following Hadith:

Tabari II:69 “Abraham did not know exactly where he was expected to build it, since Allah had not made this clear, and he felt uneasy in the matter. Some scholars say that Allah sent the Sakinah to him to show him where to build the House. The Sakinah went with Abraham, who was also accompanied by his wife Hagar and his son Ishmael, who was a small boy.”

As I explained at the time, Shekhinah is a product of Rabbinic Judaism and appears throughout the Talmud, Mishnah, Midrash, Targum, and Zohar. It is used to 206represent the divine presence of HaShem dwelling among the religious.

Derived as a compound of shachen | neighbor and mishkan | dwelling, shekhinah afforded rabbis the ability to project their G-d’s presence wherever it suited them. They use it to beguile their brethren into believing that their Babylonian Talmud is so essential, the Shekhinah of HaShem hovers over it whenever they read it. According to the rabbis, the Shekhinah of their G-d is present when a minion (ten Jews praying) is formed. When the rabbis preside as judges, it is Shekhinah Time. And according to the Talmud, the Shekhinah traveled alongside the rabbis during the Diaspora while providing the highest and best form of the six types of holy fire.

However, the damage to Islam is not limited to the Sunnah Traditions. Even in the Quran, we find Allah pilfering the religious lore of local rabbis…

Quran 048.018 “Certainly, For Him was exceedingly pleased with the believers when they pledged allegiance to you under the tree and He knew what was in their hearts. So He sent down Al-Sakinata | the Shekhinah upon them and rewarded them with an upcoming victory.”

So that you know, the reason Allah was so excited about a group of Arabs pledging their allegiance to Muhammad, was twofold. This occurred in the wake of the Satanic Verses and Night’s Journey when the non-prophet was laughed out of Petra in shame. Dauber down, Satan’s Messenger needed a pep talk in the worst way. And what could be better for a wannabe terrorist to hear these Arabs from Yathrib committing to wage war against all mankind based upon the promises Muhammad had made to them of booty in this life and in the next.

While it is obvious that Islam was all about exalting the Rabbi | Lord of the Quran above Yahowah, and also Muhammad beyond Moseh, this verse should be troubling 207for Muslims. Theirs was the only egotistical non-prophet in history. Further, every Quranic verse revealed during this period affirms that Muhammad was ridiculed, mocked, and tormented by his neighbors. Either his god hasn’t been attentive and didn’t know what was occurring, or he developed a rather demented view of esteem.

However, Muslims miss the foolishness because the first surahs revealed are at the end of the book. And by the end of Muhammad’s life, he had plundered his way to prosperity.

The “Opening Up” surah ends saying:

Quran 094.005 “So, lo, verily, with hardship there is ease,

Quran 094.006 Lo, verily, with hardship there is ease,

Quran 094.007 So when you are finished and free, labor,

Quran 094.008 And to your Lord your invocations, making Him your object.”

In context, this is absurd. Muhammad had nothing else to do. In fact, they had made a career of ditching responsibility. As soon as he became an adult, he married money and started hanging out in caves while napping in the afternoon. He finally meets his Lord, and he wraps himself in a blankie and hides.

The self-proclaimed Messenger began to recite dribs and drabs of the Quran publicly. But while the poetry may have sounded decent, the message was indecent. Almost universally, the people of Petra were outraged. According to the Quran, Muhammad’s friends and neighbors called him a “liar” and a “fraud” who was engaged in “sorcery.”

He, himself, admitted to being “possessed.” He knew that something horrible had happened to him and so did everyone else. And so he would be mocked as a “farfetched forger,” “foolish fraud,” and “specious pretender.”

208I was not the first to see Muhammad as a money-grubbing, self-aggrandizing, plagiarizing fraud. His own clan, his family, and his contemporaries saw right through his act. Consider this medley of madness:

“The unbelievers said: ‘He is a deceiving sorcerer, turning many gods into one deity.’” “There must be a motive behind the Quran. It is surely a fabrication.” “They laugh at the Quran and say, ‘Should we abandon our gods for the sake of an insane poet?’”

“Allah has not sent down anything. You are only speaking lies.” “When Our revelations are read out to them, they say, ‘This is nothing but a fabricated lie. This is nothing but pure sorcery.’” “What sort of Prophet is this? Why was no angel sent to him?”

Muhammad was called a fraud hundreds of times in the Quran. At least twenty times, his clan accused him of being the only prophet who couldn’t prove it.

This is from the 21^st surah: “They say, ‘These are only confused dreams. He has invented them. Let him therefore bring a miracle to us as the earlier prophets did.’” In the 11^th surah: “They say of the Prophet, ‘He has forged the Quran.’” From the 10^th chapter: “We find you full of folly and a liar to boot.”

Then, in the 9^th, we see the completed equation: “There are some among them who talk ill of the Prophet. For those who offend Allah’s Apostle there is a painful punishment. Have they not realized that anyone who opposes Allah and His Prophet will abide in hell forever?”

Before we turn the page on Muhammad’s opening Quranic salvo, I’d like to share this perspective on Islam’s beginnings. There is a shred of truth in the Hadith and Quran. Muhammad was running away from responsibility by being religious, as they claim. Solitude became dear to him as a recluse. He was searching for God in all the wrong places. As a result, he encountered a demon. It terrified him. Possessed and panicked, he ran home and confessed, but his social-climbing wife would have none of it. Khadija said that the demonic spirit was Allah. Ironically, she may have been right.

209She founded Islam by bequeathing the family business, the Ka’aba Inc., Qusayy’s religious scam, to her recluse husband, cousin, and employee. “The Lord” became Muhammad’s ambition. The Quran became a tool, one used to claim his prize. The indigent boy who was tortured and demeaned would terrorize and denigrate the world around him.

The Lord would, at the same time, press his case. He was the Snake who coveted being God. Delusional and demented, he would rant, threatening to resurrect everyone so that he could torture them for not buying what he was selling.

